Abuses Stripped and Whipped, Book · Satire 8

Abuses Stripped and Whipped · Book · Satire 8

OF COVETOVSNES.

SATYR. 8.

BVt of that Passion how mist I to tell,

The same that brings her Pedigree from hell?

Cal'd Auarice, a humor vile and base,

And yet as common as to hauehave a face:

I muse it scap't, I say, since Ile be plaine,

I looke not vp but see where it doth raigne;

Many I know, and yet indeed but few,

That can this slauish dunghill-vice eschew;

I neither can excuse sex nor degree,

Young folks, nor such as middle-aged be:

Nay I perceiue them giuen most to craue,

VVhen they had need to dig themselues a graue,

Like earth-bred moles they scramble in the dust,

Not for the treasure that shall neuer rust;

But for vile cankred drosse is all their care,

As if the same their summum bonum were.

When all that they hauehave with their labour bought

In my opinion is not worth a thought:

I hauehave knowne Chuffs, that hauing well to liue,

Yea and sufficient for to lend and giuegive:

Will naith'less toyle, moile, and take more paine,

Then a Iewes bond-slaue, or a M…re in Spaine;

All day they brooke the raine, haile, frost and snow,

And then as if they had not drudg'd enough,

They lie and thinke all night with care & sorrow,

How they may take as little rest the morrow.

'Tis strange their minds so much for gold should itch

And being gotten that it should bewitch;

It is by nature in a prison pent,

VnderUnder our feet i'th' basest element:

And shall we pluck't from dungeons, filth, and mire

To giuegive 't the chiefest seat in our desire?

'Twere want of iudgement, but braue spirits know

Tis base, and therefore doe account it so.

I hauehave heard those say that trauell to the East,

Where this beloued mettaile hath its neast,

That in those places where such minerals be

Is neither grasse, nor herbe, nor plant, nor tree;

A cursed soile; and this at home I find,

That those which too-much do imploy their minde

About that trash; their hearts are (Ile be bold)

As barraine as the earth where men digge gold.

This humor hath no bounds, tis a desire,

(Or disease rather) nothing can expire;

'Tis hell, for had it all the world, yet,

It longs asmuch as if't had ne're a whit;

A boundlesse gulfe: and I lament their paine

Who hauehave this neuer-quenched thirst of gaine;

So bottomelesse a whirle-poole that receaues

Still, yet the self-same roome still empty leaues;

Hee's mad that food to such a Vulture giues

That's neuer full; and e'ne as good fill siues

That hauehave no bottome, as for to endeauor,

To glut a Monster that will hunger euer:

Yet men still striue although it be in vaine;

And though they feele their longing still remaine,

They'l weary out themselues like him that drinks

Brine, or salt water, and still thereby thinks

To slacke his thirst at last; though he feel't more

Augmented, at each draught then twas before:

Yea, wealth doth as much lessen this desire

Of Auarice in men, as flames of fire

Alay the heate: besides, though they hauehave store,

This makes them to themselues exceeding poore;

And howsoeuer they may seeme, yet such

Vntill their dying-day are neuer rich▪

They very seldome hauehave respect or care

To promise, or Religion; thei'l not spare

To wrong their neighbour, friend, or God himselfe,

Thereby for to increase their cursed pelfe:

They neither reuerence the right of lawes,

Nor are they touched with the poore-mans cause:

They would be well content to shed their blouds,

Loose Soule and Heauen, for to saue their goods:

To talke to them of better things 'twere vaine,

For they are onelyonly capable of gaine;

They neuer liue in true societie,

Nor know they friendship, louelove, or pietie;

And in a word, those that are thereby led,

Neuer doe good till they are sick or dead.

And therefore with these vermine I wil place them▪

That serue to no vse till that we vncase them▪

I hauehave obserud' that such mens children be,

Borne many times to greatest misery;

For they hauehave neither mean es nor education,

According to their Kindred, State nor Nation:

VVhereby we see that they do often run,

Into vild actions and are quite vndone;

So then, these greeue to heare they do amisse,

But nere consider that their fault it is;

'Tis greedines that makes a man a flaue,

To that which hee should for his seruant hauehave,

And teaches him for to esteeme of more,

The vicioius-Ritchman, then the honest poore,

Alas! how many are there I could name,

Iniurious villaines; that for to defame,

Or wrong another would forsweare saluation,

As if they thought that there were no damnation?

Prouided that when they their conscience straine,

It be out of a hatred or for gaine:

Yea there be idle theeuing rogues a many,

That hauehave no Vertue, nor wil nere hauehave any:

Yet for their wealth shall highly be respected,

When honest men their beetters, are neglected,

And then…we also see that most men do,

Put many worthy titles on them toe,

That such base scummes must oft entreated be,

With good your Worship, and with cap and knee:

But sure the world is now become a gull,

To thinke such scoundrels can be worshipfull;

And yet in these dayes, if that men hauehave ritches,

Though they be hangmen, Vsurers or witches,

Diuels-incarnate, such as hauehave no shame,

To act the thing that I should blush to name,

Doth that disgrace them any whit? Fie no,

The world it meanes not for to vse them so;

There is no shame for Ritch-men in these times,

For wealth wil serue to couer any crimes:

Wert thou a crooke-back-dwarfe, deform'd in shape;

Thersites like, condition'd like an ape:

Didst neuer do a deed a good-man ought,

Nor spake true word, nor had'st an honest thought,

If thou be ritch, and hap to disagree

With one that's poore; although indeed hee bee

In eueryevery part a man and hath a Spirit

Thats truely noble, able for to merit

Euen praise of Enuy; yet if thou wilt seem

A man far worthier and of more esteeme,

Although thou canst inuent no means to blame him

Yet I can tel a trick how thou shalt shame him,

And that's but this, Report that he is poore,

And there's no way for to disgrace him more;

For so this Passion doth mens iudgement blind,

That him in whom they most perfection find,

If that he be not ritch they count him bace,

And oft hees faine to giuegive a Villaine place.

Moreouer the desire to gaine this pelfe,

Makes many a braue man to forget himselfe:

Some I hauehave knowne that for their worthy parts,

Their vertue and their skill in many Arts,

Deserued honor; and (if any can

Iudge by the outward looke, the inward man)

For to command men they me thought were born▪

And seem'd a slauish seruitude to scorne;

Yet hauehave I seene when such as these (alas!)

In hope of gaine hauehave croucht vntounto an Asse,

Obseru'd a Dolt, and much debas't their merits,

To men of vulgar and ignoble spirits;

How many of our finest wits hauehave spent,

Their times and studies in meere complement?

Greasing with praises many a fat-fed Bore,

Of whom the world thought too too well before:

How many now that followed Mars his troope

Whom force of death could neuer make to stoope?

Nay more, how many of our graue Diuines

That should seeke treasure not in earthly mines,

What store I say of these, against the haire,

(As goes the common prouerbe) can speake faire,

Flatter for gaine, and humor such base groomes,

As are not worthy of their horse-boyes roomes?

They wrong themselues, but those are counted wise

That now a daies know how to temporize:

I cannot brooke dissembling: and I vow,

E're I to any golden calfe would bow,

Flatter against my conscience, or else smother

That which I know for truth, to please another,

E're I for gaine would faune to please a clowne,

Or feed great fooles with tales of the renowne

Of their reputed fathers, when (God mend them)

Thēselues hauehave nothing why we should commend them,

And ere Ile coine a lie, be't ne're so small,

For eu'r a bragging Thraso of them all

In hope of profit; Ile giuegive vp my play,

And fall to labour for a groat a day;

And for my clothing in a mantle goe,

And feed on Sham-roots, as the Irish doe;

For, what contentment can in riches be,

Vnless the body and the mind be free?

But tush what's freedome? look where gold beares sway,

It takes That Credit, yea and Wit away;

Corrupts the iudgement, and can make the lawes

Oft-times to fauour an vngodly cause:

Besides, a worldly mind doth so affect,

Where wealth abounds, & beares so much respect

To those that hauehave it: that their vice they deeme

To be a vertue, and so make it seeme;

For, say they vse extortion, no men more,

Vndoe their Country, hurt and wrong the poore,

Be damn'd Vsurers, and keep a house,

That yeelds not crums enough to feed a mouse:

Yet they'l not say hee's couetous; oh no,

Hee's thrifty, a good wary man, or so.

Another though in pride he doe excell,

Be more ambitious then the Prince of hell;

If his apparell be in part like vsus,

Italian, Span…sh, French and Barbarous,

Although it be of twenty seuerall fashions,

All borrowed from as many forraine nations;

Yet hee's not vaine, nor proud; what is he than?

Marry a proper, fine, neat Gentleman,

Or if he be a drunkard that can swagger,

Goe daily armed with an alehouse dagger,

Quaffe soule-sick-healths vntill his eyes doe stare,

Sing baudy Songs, and rounds, and curse and sweare;

Though he vse gaming, as the cards and dice,

So out of measure that he mak't a vice,

Turne his owne house into a filthy stewes,

Keep whores, and knaues, and baudes, as that's no newes

Yet if he be a rich man what is he,

A rude ranke ruffine if you aske of me,

A Ruffin? Guep Iack sauce-boxe with a wannion,

Nay hee's a merry and a boone companion,

This is the Worlds censure. Yet beside,

Another qualitie I hauehave espide;

For those diseases they doe shun the poore,

They doe abhor a Rich-man ne're the more:

Him I hauehave knowne that hath disdain'd to sup

Water, or beere, out of a poore mans cup,

For feare of poysoning, or some thing as bad,

Although he knew no malady he had;

And yet hauehave I, seene the same curious Asse,

Pledging a rich-man in the selfe-same glasse:

When he hath knowne the party (if you please

Ile speakeplaine English) had the French disease:

But as the Prouerb saith, Birds of a feather

VVill alwaies vse to flock and feed together:

I hauehave oft mused and doe still admire,

That men should hurtfull riches so desire,

For weigh it well and you shall find it fils,

The owner of it with a thousand ill's,

Much worse then these forenam'd: for why we find,

It choakes and mar's the Vertues of the mind:

Then we perceiue it greatly doth annoy,

Vexes the heart, and hinders the true ioy

Would else be there; And as it may appeare,

Loads vsus with diuers troubles, cares and feare:

It makes vsus to grow arrogant, vniust,

Drawes vntounto pleasure, and prouokes to lust:

More hopefull for to practise villany,

Then for to further vsus in honesty,

It nere contents the owners that enioy it,

And those that hauehave it many times employ it

To corrupt iustice; or for to allure,

Matrons, or Virgins, to an act impure:

It hires murthers, and makes men seditious,

Full of suspect, and enuie, or ambitious:

Yea it breeds claw-backs, pick-thanks, flattery,

Makes many theeues and causes periury:

It hinders knowledge, for most that hauehave lands,

Liue neither by their wisedome nor their hands.

They follow sloath and pleasure, not the schooles,

And that's the reason there's such wealthy fooles:

These are the fruits of wealth; yet that alone

Seemes now the fairest marke of eueryevery one

To make his course for; and which to attaine,

Or keep once gotten, we refuse no paine

Labor nor danger; yet it doth appeare,

They think that all, which they were plac't for here:

Now ther's a Counterpassion vntounto this,

Which to speake something of 'twere not amisse:

Those, subiect therevnto, hauehave got a fashion,

That's quite contrarie to the former Passion.

Fore'ne as greedy men are set on fire,

With an vnquenched and a soule desire,

Of hourding Riches (God in heaven amend them)

So doe the other hie as fast to spend them:

Their … diuers; some vaine-glorious Asses.

Consu…n't in gaudy cloathes; and looking glasses;

Others blowne vp e'ne with the selfe same bellowes

Seeke to obtaine the louelove of all good fellowes;

These at the Althouse hauehave their daily pots

Though they be there or no. And looke what shots,

Are in their chambers spent, be't nere so many,

He doth them wrong that thinks to pay a penny;

These feast at Tauernes their supposed friends,

That pay with, Thankes, we nere shall make …:

Yea, and in more things they hauehave lauish bin,

But those are pathes I'uc no experience in,

Yet such as they ere many yeares be past,

Will wish (I warrant) they had held it fast,

When for their kindnes and their former cheere,

They hardly shall procure a cup of beare.

But there must needs be some men prone there to,

Or how a diuell shall our sharker doe?

Yet can I not say rightly that these be,

From Auarice and greedinesse quite free:

For though they doe consume it knauishly,

And spend it on vaine pleasures lauishly,

They gladly would their euill course maintaine,

And therefore ouerslip no meanes of gaine,

For they hauehave vsed (by their owne confession)

Secret and open Robberies; Oppression,

And diuers tricks which show this spending vice,

May hauehave some reference to Auarice.

Others there are, (but few) who hauing store,

Neglect their wealth, and rather would be poore;

And why? it stops the way to heauen they say;

Sure being misimployed so it may:

And therefore rather then they should abuse it,

'Twere good they had it that know how to vse it:

For such are lightly weake in resolution,

And men but of a simple constitution,

Or are by some seducing Villan taught,

That their goods (rather then their good) hauehave sought:

Now I suppose the man that well obtaines

His wealth, and in an honest calling gaines,

More wisedome shewes in vsing it aright,

Then such a Cynnick as contemnes in quite.

Men will be in extreames; but sure the lesse,

Is to neglect wealth, for much greedines,

Makes not the body onelyonly, leane and foule,

But also spreads infection to his soule,

And clogges her so with things of no account,

That she is ouer-poyz'd to much, to mount.

But those that for to goe astray are loth,

Vse their endeuours to auoide them both.