A Bartholomew Fairing for Parents to Bestow, Afterword – Colophon
An afterwritte to the gentle Reader.
MY purpoſe was (right gentle Reader) in this ſhort diſcourſe before going, by ſtrong and ſounde proues to make this point of doctrine appeare moſt clearely, the which of the moſte hath neuer bin ſo much as once thought vponupon, and whereof a greate number, very ſenſible men otherwiſe, hauehave hitherto bin of this perſwaſion, that the word of God, ſpeaketh not at all, namely of this duty of the parentes in making choiſe for theyr childrens mariage, or of the obedience, the which the ſonnes and daughters in this reſpect do owe, vntounto the godly choiſe of their fathers and mothers in this ſo holy an action.
How I hauehave performed the ſame, I leaue vntounto the iudgement of the indifferent Reader, vponupon the conſiderations of the reaſons and authorities by me alleaged, in the which my chiefe end and drift was, to ſatisfie the godly and wel diſpoſed Chriſtians, the which will make ſome care of conſcience to performe that hereafter, the which hitherto of ignorance and want of inſtruction, they hauehave neglected and omitted. For when as parents ſhall hencefoorth plainelie ſee,Parentes. that God himſelfe layeth vponupon them this neceſsarie duetie of beſtowing their children honeſtlie and godlie in wedlocke: and the children euidentlie nowe perceiue that they ought to ſtand vntounto the godlie choiſe of their parentes, thoſe in whoſe heartes the feare of God is not vtterlie quenched, will henceforward indeuour themſelues to yeeld obedience vntounto their ſuperiours in this moſt neceſsarie and waightie dutie,Children. with all willingneſſe being contented to bee ruled, and not to ſeeke rule, nor to intrude and thruſt themſelues into the right and libertie of their parentes, vponupon whom the Lord in his wiſdome hath laide his charge, ſo that without their priuitie and conſent, they will not intangle themſelues in mariage, nor ſeeke vntounto themſelues matches, ſuch as may bee griefes and eie-fores vntounto their louing Parentes, vntounto whome in the Lorde they worthelie owe all obedience and dutifull ſubiection. I ſpeake here of the godlie and better ſort both of parentes and alſo children, who beeing of the people and Church of God, will be ordered and ruled by the lawes and ordinances, the which hee himſelfe hath ſet downe for the direction and gouernment of the ſame in all other their waies and actions. As for the wicked and vngodlie, which rebelliouſlie thinke in their hearts and ſometimes blaſphemouſlie vtter with their mouthes: Let vsus breake his bandes and caſt his cordes from vsus. that is,Pſal. 2.4. will not ſuffer God to raign ouer them after ſuch manner as he hath appointed in his word, I make ſmall account or reckoning of their either liking or diſliking of this my ſimple labour, but refer them ouer vntounto him that dwelleth in heauen, & laugheth at them and ſhall hauehave them in deriſion. But vntounto all you that either be in trueth Chriſtians, or otherwiſe would ſo be taken and accounted, know you that this cuſtome of the parentes placing and beſtowing their children in mariage, is as hath bene ſhewed, moſt ancient, and commēdable, yea and approoued by our Lord and Sauiour Chriſt himſelfe alſo in the xx of Luke,Luk, 20.11. where, going about to confute the errour of the Saduces, the which, if there were a reſurrection (which they denie) did ſuppoſe that there muſt be alſo mariage, he auoucheth it to hauehave bene the ordinarie practiſe of the men of thoſe times to giuegive their children to be maried: ſaieng, The children of this world mary wiues, and are giuen or beſtowed in mariage, foreign … …th to place … beſtow in marriage, as the parents …, …hē as they giuegive their children to be marriedfor ſo doeth the verb foreign, which in that place hee vſeth, moſt properlie in the iudgment of the learned ſignifie. And by the men of this world, as well the wicked as the godly, leaſt that otherwiſe wee might thinke that mariage dooth not appertaine vntounto the children of God if we ſhould here take children of this world as oppoſite and ſette againſt the children of light, or of God, as I confeſſe it muſt ſome times bee taken, which in this place cannot be leaſte it might ſeeme to giuegive ſome countenaunce vntounto the error before recited. So that hereby clearely appeareth, that in the dayes of Chriſt 1589, yeares ſithens and more, this was an order generally obſerued, for the parentes in mariage to place and beſtowe their children, the which alſo Beza,Beza ſaith that this place moſt ſtrongly proueth the power & authority of parentes in beſtowing their children in mariage. and Feguernekinus, who hath profitably abridged Marlorat his common places, doth note vponupon this place. Let not Chriſtians therfore diſlike of that, which Chriſt himſelfe, after whom they are named, ſeemeth to commend. But let them rather, knowing what God looketh for at their handes, in due ſeaſon prouide wiues for their ſonnes, and huſbandes for their daughters, leaſt by forſlowing the time too long, they bee either preuented by their childrens to raſh contracting themſelues, or otherwiſe to their greater ſorrowe, ſee them runne into more greater folly, as it often commeth to paſſe, when as the ſonnes and daughters, think that their fathers and mothers hauehave no care of them in this behalfe, yea in this buſines let them carrie ſo gentle an hand towarde their children, that they themſelues feeling beſt their owne eſtate, when as they be come vntounto years and diſcretion conuenient, may, if their childly modeſty will ſuffer them deale with their parentes concerning this matter in an humble and reuerend manner by themſelues, or otherwiſe by the godly intercesſion of their friendes, who at their motion may put their parentes in minde, in time conuenient to hauehave care of theſe caſes, by meanes whereof, many inconueniences and diſorders ſhal bee met with ill before hand, the which for want of this Chriſtiā foreſight on both ſides, do too vſually fall out, to the diſhonour of God, and offence of his Church The end of all is, that both the parentes and the children, vnderſtanding what God looketh for on both their partes in this buſines, ſet aſide all caueling and cunning gloſes to ſhake of this dutie. For I will not trouble my ſelfe wyth aunſwering theſe many and vaine obiections on this behalfe, vſuall to bee alleaged on both ſides, but refer them ouer vntounto the thorow ſhifting of their ſeuerall conſciences in theſe actions, according vntounto that, the which by this treatiſe, they ſhall learne to appertaine vntounto their ſeuerall duties, that they may in ſincerity and truth effect the ſame, being deſirous, as purpoſedly to offend none, ſo gladly in this point to ſatiffie al, the which if it be not alreādy performed accordingly, ſo far as the queſtion taken in hand, to proue requireth, I will endeuour, as I ſhall heareafter by any the godly be aduertiſed, and labour (God willing) more fully and largely (ſo far as in me lieth) to ſet downe, to the full contentment of all ſuch as are not purpoſedlye reſolued and determined, in this cauſe to cauill, thwartle, and diſſemble, hoping that the godly ſhall profite, to the perfourming of a neceſſary dutie, yet of a great parte left vnperfourmed, and the wicked bee made vnexcuſeles, when the accounts muſt be rendred, before that iudge, which ſha…l geue ſentence without regarde of the perſon of any whatſoeuer, that ſhall coulorably ſeeke to withdraw his necke out of his lawful and dutifull obedience. Wherefore in this duty, or any other, the which the warrant of God his word may iuſtifie, howſoeuer the ſame in any reſpect may ſeeme ſtrange vntounto vsus, let it bee our continuall and moſt earneſt praier, to deſire God to ſubdue our corrupt and carnall affections vntounto his moſt holie will, and godlie pleaſure, ſo far foorth as we ſhall hauehave his word the infallible lode-ſtone to direct and guide vsus vntounto the ſame, for Chriſt his ſake. Amen.
LONDON. Printed by Iohn Wolfe for Iohn Hariſon the yoonger, dwelling in Paternoſter-row, at the ſigne of the golden Ancher. 1589.
End of the text · John Stockwood, A Bartholomew Fairing for Parents to Bestow (1589)