A Golden Chain, Chapter 7 – Chapter 10
CHAP. VII. Of Sobrietie, Vrbanitie, Fidelitie, and care of others good name.
SObrietie in iudgement is, when a man either suspendeth his opinion of his neighbours sayings or doings, or else speaketh as charitably as hee can, by saying as little as may bee, if the thing bee euil: or by interpreting all in better part, if the speech or action be doubtfull. Therefore doe thus; despise not thy neighbour, but thinke thy selfe as bad a sinner, and that the like defects may befall thee. If thou canst not excuse his doing, excuse his intent, which may be good: or if the deede be euill, thinke it was done of ignorance: if thou canst no way excuse him, think some great temptation befel him, & that thou shouldst be worse, if the like temptation befel thee: and giuegive God thanks that the like as yet hath not befallen thee. Despise not a man beeing a sinner, for though hee be euil to day, he may turne to morrowe.
Here is condemned all headie and rash iudgement,Mat. 7.1. whereby men make things either worse then they are, or else they take and turne all things to the worse part. Thus the deuil dealt with Iob, saying,Iob. 1.9. 11. Doeth Iob feare God for nought, &c. but stretch out thine hand now and touch all that hee hath, to see if hee will not blaspheme thee to thy face. Such was the dealing of Doeg with Dauid,1. Sam. 22.9 I saw the sonne of Ishai (saith he) when hee came to Abimelech the sonne of Ahitub, who asked counsell of the Lord for him, and gaue him victuals, and he gaue him also the sword of Goliah the Philistim. Here the backebiter concealeth the necessary circumstances, whereby Abimelech might hauehave bene excused, as that Dauid asked bread beeing hungrie, and that he told not Abimelech that hee was out of Sauls fauour: but he turneth al his speech to this end, to bring the priest into suspition with Saul.
Thus the Pharises dealt.Mat. 11.19. Iohn came neither eating nor drinking, and they say, he hath a deuill. The sonne of man came eating and drinking, & they say, Behold a glutton, and a drinker of wine, and a friend of Publicans and sinners.
Contrarie to this Sobrietie is Flatterie, whereby for hope either of fauour or gaine, men, and especially such as are of dignitie and place, are soothed vp in their sinnes, and extolled aboute measure, euen to their faces. As when Herod arrayed in royall apparell, and sate on the iudgement seat and made an oration, the people gaue a shout, saying,Act. 12.22 The voice of God, and not of man. But marke what Salomon saith,Pro. 27. 14. Hee that praiseth his friend with a loud voice rising early in the morning: it shall be counted to him for a curse. One being asked which was the worst of all beasts, answered, Of wild beasts, the tyrant: of tame beasts the flatterer. And another said, that flatterers were worse then crowes: for they eate onelyonly dead carrion, these feede on liuing men.
And of all kinds of Flatterie, that is the worst when a man shall speak faire to his neighbours face and praise him; but behind his backe speake his pleasure, and euen cut his throat. Dauid complaineth of his familiar friend… Psal. 54.11.that the words of his mouth were softer then butter, yet warre was in his heart: that his words were more gentle then oile, yet they were swordes. The Pharises behinde Christs backe tooke counsell howe they might intangle him in talke; but before his face they say,Mat. 24.16. Master, we knowe that thou art true, and teachest the way of God truely, neither carest thou for any man: for thou considerest not the person of men.
Vrbanitie, is a grace of speech, whereby men in seemely manner vse pleasantnesse in talke for recreation, or for such delight as is ioyned with profit to themselues and others. The Preacher saith,Eccl. 3.4. Psa. 126.1,2 There is a time to laugh, and a time to weepe. When the Lord brought againe the captiuitie of Sion, wee were like them that dreame. Then was our mouth filled with laughter, and our tongue with ioy.
Nowe this mirth must bee ioyned with the feare of God, otherwise Salomon saith well, I hauehave said to laughter, thou art mad: and of ioy, what is that tho… doest? And Christ saieth,Eccl. 2.2. Luk. 6.25. Amos 6.6. Woe to you that now laugh, for ye shall weepe. Secondly with compassion and sorrow for Gods people in affliction and miserie. They drinke wine in bowles, and annoint themselues with cheiefe ointments, but no man is sorry for the affliction of Ioseph. Thirdly, it must be sparing and moderate. Paul condemneth such as are louers of pleasures, more then of God. 2. Tim. 3.Fourthly, it must be voide of the practise of sinne.Heb. 11. Moses is commended that he refused the pleasures of sinne.
Iudg. 14. 12.The vsuall time of mirth is at meates. And here Sampsons practise may be followed, who at his marriage feast propounded a riddle or hard question to his friends. And Ambrose thinketh that hee did this to stoppe the mouthes of talkers, and to occupie their wits.
With all it must be remembred to be a Christian dutie, euen at the table to maintaine talke of religion,Luk. 11. 37. & 14.1. & 22.15. and of duties of godlinesse, after the practise of our Sauiour Christ: though many vponupon little ground thinke otherwise. Tertullian recordeth of the Christians of his time,Apol. c. 39. that they vsed in their louelove-feasts to talke togither, as considering with themselues that they had God himselfe as an eare-witnesse to them. Chrysostome of this point saith well.Hom. 2. in 2. Thess. 2. cap. I would to God (saith he) that in tauerns and feasts, and at bathes, men would talke and dispute of hell: for the remembring of hell would hinder a man from falling to hell. And it was the manner of the primitiue Church at Dinner and supper to vse the reading of the Scriptures.August. epist. 109. When yee come to the table (saith Augustine) heare that which is read according to custome, without any stirre or striuing: that your mouthes may not onelyonly receiue the meat, but your eares may hunger after the word of God. And this ancient custome is to this day retained in the Colledges of the Vniuersitie of Cambridge.
And this holy reioycing at meates is specially to bee vsed with such as are godly. As Salomon saith,Prou. 23.8. Act. 2.46. that he which eateth at the couetous mans table, shal vomit his morsells, and shall loose his sweete wordes. The faithfull at Ierusalem did breake bread togither, with gladnes and singlenes of heart.
Question. Whether iesting be tollerable in any sort, or not?
Answer. That iesting which standeth in quippes, taunts, and girdes, which serueth onelyonly for the offence of some, with the delight of others is not tollerable: because all speech must edifie, and minister grace to the hearers: Eph. 4.25.neither doth it agree with Christian grauitie and modestie. But two kindes of iesting are tollerable: the one is moderate and sparing mirth, in the vse of things indifferent, in season conuenient, without the least scandall of any man, and with profit to the hearers. The second is that which the Prophets vsed, when they iested against wicked persons yet so, as withall they sharpely reprooued their sinnes. At noone Eliah mocked them, and said, Crie aloud, for hee is a God: 1. Kin. 18.27 2. Kin. 2. 23. Isai. 14. 11.either he talketh or pursueth his enemies, or is in his iourney, or it may bee he sleepeth and must be awaked.
As for laughter, it may be vsed: otherwise God would neuer hauehave giuen that power and faculty vntounto man: but the vse of it must be both moderate and seldome,Luk. 19. Ioh. 11. Heb. 5.7. as sorrowe for our sinnes is to be plentifull and often. This we may learne in Christs example, of whome wee reade that hee wept three times, at the destruction of Ierusalem, at the raising of Lazarus, and in his agonie: but we neuer read that he laughed. And specially remember the saying of Chrysostome. Si risus in Ecclesia diaboli opus est, that is, to mooue laughter in the Church, is the worke of the deuill.
Fidelitie is constancy in all our lawefull sayings and promises.
A promise is to be made with this condition (if God will) and then if a man be preuented by death,Iam. 1.15. 1. Chr. 13.2. 2. Cor. 1.17. 23. or by any like meanes, he is not to blamed: otherwise a mans lawefull word and promise bindeth him according to the will & pleasure of him to whome it is made.
Nowe if afterward it be hurtfull to him that made it, hee may craue to bee free from his promise:Psal. 5. 4. and libertie beeing graunted, take it. But a promise bound with an oath is to be kept, though priuate hinderances followe: yet so, as the Magistrate may order the matter, and proceede in equitie, that the dammage may be the lesse.
The last grace which is to bee vsed in speech, is care of our neighbours good name,Prou. 22. which is farre better to him then great riches.
Here is condemned the tale bearer, which of an euill minde telleth a thing of an other, to bring him into hatred, or to reuenge himselfe, or to get something, which otherwise he could not obtaine.
This tale bearing is of diuers sortes. One is, when men whisper abroad secretly the fault of another,Rom. 1.30. Gen. 9. whereas they should rather admonish the partie, as Cham when he had seene his fathers nakednes, ran straight and tolde his brethrē. The secōd, whē they adde to or chāge the thing said or done, as it serueth for their purpose. Some of the witnesses which came against Christ, charged him to say, I will destroy this temple which is made with handes, and in three daies build another without handes. Where first they change his meaning; for Christ spake of the temple of his bodie. Secondly, they adde to the words, For Christ said not,Mat. 26.60. 61. I will destroy this temple: but, destroy ye this temple. Therefore the holy Ghost noteth them with the name of false witnesse bearers. The third, when men surmisse, and tell that which was neuer done. When Ieremy was going out of Ierusalem to the land of Beniamin, and was in the gate of Beniamin, Irijah tooke him and said, Thou fliest to Chaldeans. Then said Ieremie, that is false, I flie not to the Chaldeans, but hee would not heare him.Ier. 37.13. The fourth is the coloured tale-bearing, when one speaketh euill of another, with fine prefaces & preamples, faining that he is very sorrie that his neighbour hath done such or such a thing: that he speaketh it not of malice, but of a good mind: that he is constrained to speake: that he speaketh not all he could speake: that the partie to whome the tale is tolde must keepe it secret. Luther writeth of this fault very well.vponupon Psal. 15. 3. This vice (saith he) whereby wee tell abroad the things which wee heare of others, and take them in worse part is very rife, and of great force to sowe discords: the rather, because it often shewes it selfe vnderunder the pretence and name of counsell and good aduise. And it is a notable vizard for a talebearer to transforme himselfe into an angel of light, and vnderunder zeale for Gods glorie to backbite and accuse his neighbour of heresie, errour, and wicked life.
Therefore the Prophets meaning is, that we should conceale the euils that bee in our neighbour, and not speake them to others, though hee be an enemie and deserue it at our handes, and onelyonly speake of those good things in him which seeme to preserue concord: for this we would that men should doe vntounto vsus. Yea, and let vsus take heede that we iudge not or condemne any mans saying or doing rashly. Confess. li. 9.Augustine saith, that this was the care which his mother had towards her enemies. To doe this is a notable point of iust dealing, but indeede there is no man vtterly without this fault in this life: such is our wretched state in this world. For though some are of this minde, that they desire not to hauehave other mens wants tolde them, and will not take all in worse part, yet if they bee tolde and taken in worse part of others, they can willingly heare them, Ierem. 40.neither will they checke the teller, but suffer bad surmises to take place with them. But Gedaliah the sonne of Ahicham excelled in the contrarie vertue, who …hose rather to hazard his life, then to suspect euill by Ismael.
This tale-bearing is the common table talke in England: and it is wonderfull to see, how those who are otherwise godly, are ouertaken with it: but men must learn to stand more in awe of Gods cōmandement, and also to consider that the same thing a man speaketh of another, commeth home againe by his owne doore. Such as vse tale-bearing and backbiting, are by Gods iust iudgement paid home in the same kind: and hereupon Christ saith, Iudge not that ye be not iudged, for with what iudgement ye iudge, ye shall be iudged. Wherefore when men shall enter any euill communication of others, we are to interrupt it by other talke, as not regarding it.
Here remember, that when gouernours and magistrates shall vse hard words, not in the way of defamation, but for the reproouing of a vice, it is not to slaunder:Gal. 3. Math. 3. as, O foolish Galatians: O generation of vipers. And Christ tearmeth Herod, Foxe.
CHAP. VIII. Of the bondes of Truth.
THus much of grace in speech. Now followeth bonds of truth, whereby the truth of our talke is testified and confirmed.
There are three: A simple assertion, an asseueration, an oath.
A simple assertion, is either a simple affirmation, as yea, yea: or a simple negation, as nay, nay. And they are to be vsed onelyonly in our familiar and common talke.Math. 5. Let your communication be yea, yea: nay, nay: and whatsoeuer is more, commeth of euill.
If the trueth which wee affirme or denie be doubtfull or contingent, then such clauses as these [It is so, or, it is not so as I thinke, as I remember, as I take it] are to be added. If one shall say, It is so, and afterwards it prooue otherwise, he receiueth discredit, because he spake an vntruth. But if he shall say, I thinke it is so, though it fall out otherwise, yet he saueth his credit, because he deceiueth not, but onelyonly is deceiued.
An asseueration is a forme of speech, wherby one doth vehemently affirme or denie any thing: as when a man shall say, Verily, in truth, in very truth, without all doubt, &c. These and such like are not to be vsed at eueryevery word: but then onelyonly when a truth of greater importance is to be confirmed. When the false prophets among the Iewes and the Priests would not beleeue that Ieremie was sent of God: what saith he? not simply, The Lord hath sent me: but, In truth the Lord hath sent me. Our Sauiour Christ, when he vsed to speake any weightie matter, vsed to say, Amen, Amen, Verily, verily, which is a plain asseueration: for Amen is more then a simple affirmation, and it is lesse then an oath, as the very sense of the word doth import: which is no more, but truly, certenly.
The third is an oath, which must not be made by any thing in heauen or earth, but onelyonly by the Name of God alone.
It must be vsed as the last refuge and remedie of all. For when any truth of great importance is to be confirmed, and all signes, euidences, proofes, witnesses, faile among men on earth: then we may lawfully fetch the Lord as a witnesse from heauen, who is the knower of all truth.
And in this case an oath may be taken; either publikely before a Magistrate, or priuately among priuate persons, if it bee done with reuerence and consideration,Gen. 31. 53. as it was betweene Iacob and Laban.
CHAP. IX. What is to be done when we hauehave spoken.
Prou. 17.25.AFter a man hath spoken his minde, very few words more are to be added. He that hath knowledge spareth his wordes. In many wordes there can not want iniquitie: but he that refraineth his lips is wise.
He that speaketh many wordes, speaketh either false things or superfluous, or both: as when a riuer ouerflowes, the water gathereth much slime: so many wordes, many faults. When a vessell being smitten makes a great noise, it is a token that it is emptie: and so the sound of many wordes shewes a vaine heart. The Gentiles hauehave said; that God gaue a man one tongue and two eares, that he might heare more and speake lesse. Valerius Maximus reporteth of Xenocrates, that beeing in the company of some that vsed railing speeches, helde his tongue: and beeing asked why hee did so, answered, That it had repented him that he had spoken, but it neuer repented him that he had held his peace. And the prouerb is, He that will speake what he will, shall heare what hee would not. Offic. lib. 1.To the framing of our speech Ambrose requireth three things: a yoke, a ballance, and a metwand: a yoke, to keepe it in staied grauitie: a ballance to giuegive it weight of reason: a metwand, to keepe it in measure and moderation.
This rule must be practised carefully, for the auoiding of chiding, brawling, and contention. Let nothing be done by contention, Phil. 2.3. Let students & schollers learne to practise this: for what shall an other mans opiniō hurt thee: though in reasoning he be not of thy minde in eueryevery point.
Here take heed of the spirit of Contradiction, whereby some by thwarting and contradicting eueryevery man, at length prooue either obstinate heretickes, or lewd Atheists, and make no bones to contradict the holy Ghost, and to call the scriptures in question, and dispute that there is no God.
Act. 20.7.Nowe if a man speake necessarie things, though he continue his speech till midnight, as Paul did, it can not be called immoderate or superfluous talke.
CHAP. X. Of writing.
ALL this which is set downe concerning speech, must as wel be practised in writing as in speaking. Whereby are condemned ballads, bookes of louelove, all idle discourses and histories, beeing nothing els but enticements and baites vntounto manifold sinnes, fitter for Sodome and Gomorrah, then for Gods Church. And it must be followed as well in speaking of latine or any other tongue, as English, which students hauehave not marked; for whereas they wil not sweare in English, yet in Latine they make no bones of it, saying, Mehercuse, mediùs, fidiùs, aedipol, per deos immortales. And whereas they hold but one God in iudgement, yet in their Latine exercises they speake of Iupiter and of the immortall Gods … after the manner of the heathen. What a shame is this, that a Christian, and that in Christian schooles, should either be ashamed or not vse to speake as a Christian, but as Atheists doe? If thou hauehave many tongues and knowest not how to vse them well: he which hath but his mother tongue, ordering it aright, is a better linguist then thou.