The Pageant of Popes, Book 6 · Part 40 – Part 41
160. Alexander the sixt.
ALexander the sixt was a Spaniard borne in Valentia, called first Rodericus Borgia, succeeded Innocentius: his deedes were so opprobrious and wicked, as hath beene sildome heard. He was a very royotous tyraūt & in league with the deuil to obtaine the Papacye. He being long vice-chauncelour in his Cardinalship, did search and boult out all the estate and trade of the Court of Rome, and all the councelles and secretes of all the Princes and encorporations of Italye. And therefore being Pope by the helpe of of his bastarde Valentinus (whom of a Cardinall he made captaine calling him Caesarius) he did almost destroy them all: and rooted out and banished the most mightye and honourable houses of Rome, so that afterward he stoode not in awe of anye of them. Iu…the which bickeringe (sayth Valerius) the garrison of Frenchmen and Heluetians being murthered both man and woman, this proud Captaine Caesarius beinge by meanes of his wyfe duke of Valentia, purposing to get a bootye of money, gaue to certaine Cardinals a pociō of Aconita wherof his father also drancke, so that he fell a sleepe with the rest, and then ye sonne with the stroke of a weapon quenched the vndeserued honour of both. This Alexāder held ye Iubelie at Rome Anno 1500. whither infinite multitudes of people resorted: but for those that either would not or could not come, ye Pope by his bull imparted to them the blessing and benefite of ye Iubelie if they woulde giuegive moneye for it. He spared no shamefull shifte to make money withall: and therefore he did found yet another newe colledge for clarkes of briefes (for so were they called that write the abridgements of all matters) & these were in nomber foure score, of the which eueryevery one payd for his place vii. hūdred crownes. He cited al Princes by auctoritye of his bull to come to the Iubelie, and appointed standings in eueryevery countrye in the streates, whither the people should resorte to send their money thether. By his Legate Iohn Borgia he crowned Alphonsus king of Naples, and (sayth Platina) made him sweare to be true to Rome in paying his yearely tribute faithfullye. He bestowed infinite riches in repayringe and garnishing Churches, Castels, towers, hyewayes and houses in Rome. Volateranus sayth that he murthered manye vertues by his notorious vices which are not to be named, onlye (sayth he) I will touche those that were knowen in the eyes of the people. If he were at anye time at leasure, he had no regarde what kinde of recreation he vsed withoute respecte of his estate. He flitted often to Adrian castell because he might the better come out openlye to behold such shewes and delightes, as maskers, mommers, daunters, harlots and strompets, and other worse kinde of people vsing these braueryes vponupon hollydayes and other times: he delighted much to see the lasciuious cōmedyes of Plautus and other like enterludes played. At the mariage of one of his doughters he procured extraordinarily to hauehave it solemnized with running at the tilt and hunting. Fensers & roisters were neuer so suffered in Rome, neither the Citizens so bridled as in his time. Beside, the Citye was much encombred with vagaboundes so that men coulde neither walke safe in the Citye by night, nor without the Citye by daye. Now was Rome become a slaughterhouse, which hath somtime beene a refuge and defence for men. All these (sayth Volateran) he suffered for his bastards sake, to whō he graunted all thinges at pleasure &c. But as ye hauehave heard before he dyed in ye ende of the same poyson which he caused his sonne to prouide for other: farther of his doīges and of his sonnes warres by him procured & maintayned, Volateran wryteth at large.
Platina sayth howe that when Charles the eight king of Fraunce should passe throughe Italye to Naples with an army to challenge it as his enheritaunce, this Pope Alexander fearing the puissāce of that noble king, did for feare of him make a league with Alphonsus king of Naples against the French kinge, & planted a garison of souldiours in Rome least the king should inuade it. For it is ingrafted in the Italians that they enuieng the prosperitye of the Frenchmē, do alwayes detest euen ye very name of Fraūce… so that they swearing and vowing freindship with them, are not nothing abasshed in despite of God and iustice, to breake their leagues. And yet notwithstandinge this the Popes power, yet kinge Charles preuayled in his purpose maugre their hartes and came to Rome, where for feare least he should by violence breake awaye from himselfe to their greater damage, the Pope cōmaunded that he should be curteouslye let in, and that none of the Romaine souldiours vponupon paine of death should make any sturre, and so did Charles likewyse commaunde his armye. And yet the cowardlye Pope wyth a bande of men fled dastardlye into Angel castell: but after he perceyued that quietnesse was kept in the Citye, he maketh a league with Charles, sēding home to Alphonsus his souldiours againe. But after this when Charles had beene in Apulia and cōquered it, he prepared to returne home into Fraūce: but the Pope forgetting or neglecting his league & oath, thoughte to cut him short of his purpose and to take the aduauntage of Charles while he trustinge to the league, shoulde not mistrust anye such falsehoode. And therefore the Pope making another league with the Vetenians, Maximilian the Emperour, Ferdinand king of Aragon, and Lewis Sfortia, prouidinge an armye laye in wait for Charles his comming at Fornonium not farre from Parma, euen in the waye where he should passe. But notwtstanding this ambush were fourtye Thousande men, and Charles had with him but vii. Thousand trayned souldiers, wearyed with traueling and want of necessaryes, yet the bickering continued sharpe & doubtful a long time with great slaughter of the Popes armye, and in the ende Charles with little losse of his part gat the victorye. Thus reporteth Platina or rather the author that continueth the historye of Platina where he ended it, who wrote but to the time of Paule the seconde, thoughe yet he heareth ye name of ye whole worke for those yt follow are added by other. In the time of this Pope an Angell yt was placed aloft in Angel castell, was throwne downe by the violente force of thonder and lightninges, which as some thincke mighte well prognosticate the fall of the Popes estate. Iohn Tisseranus a Minorite founded at Paris an order of harlots, as if Christian religiō were to be edifyed by such orders.
¶ Uerses made vponupon Pope Alexanders death.
Fortasse nescis cuius hic tumulus sict,
Adsta viator, ni piget. &c.
Perhaps whose tombe this is (my freinde) ye do not know,
Then pause a while if that ye hauehave no haste to go.
Though Alexanders name vponupon the stone be grauen,
Tis not that great: but he yt late was prelate shorne and shauen.
Who thirsting after bloud deuourde so many a noble towne,
Who tost & turnde the ruthfull states of kingdomes vpsidedowne.
Who to enrich his sonnes so manye nobles slew,
And wast the world with fire and sword & spoyling to him drew.
Defying lawes of earth and heauen and God himselfe ere while,
So that the sinful father did the daughters bed defile.
And could not from the bandes of wicked wedlock once refraine,
And yet this pestilent prelate did in Rome tenne yeares remaine.
Now freind remember Nero or els Caligula his vice,
Or Heliogabals, enoughe: the rest ye may surmise:
For shame I dare not vtter all: away my freind wyth this.
¶ Another Epitaph vponupon Pope Alexander.
The Spaniard lyeth heare that did all honestye defye,
To speake it briefely: in this tombe all villany doth lye.
¶ Another.
Least Alexanders noble name my freind should the beguile,
Away: for heare both treachery doth lurke and mischiefe vile.
¶ Another.
Though Alexander after death did vomit matter blacke,
Yet maruel not: he drancke the same and could not cause it packe.
Diuers other like ill fauoured verses accordīg to his il fauoured maners were made of him, which for modesty sake are partlye to be suppressed, because it is not to be doubted but that chast eares would be ashamed to heare those thinges, which Pope Alexander was not ashamed to do. But amonge other Iohn Functius reporteth of him out of Volatera…, that the Cardinals which chose him did first finde him vnthāckfull: for he plagued them all with diuers myseryes, thrusting some into prison and punishing some with imprysonmente. He warred vponupon the Vrsins and conqueringe them layed them in irons and fetters. His greatest care was (as Innocentius did) to bestow great honours on his bastards. He made one of his yongest sonnes Prince of Sicilia, and another called Caesareus a Cardinall, and his eldest sonne a duke in Spaine, who wtin a while after was murthered in the night & tumbled into Tiber. His other sonne the Cardinall after the death of his brother, renounced priestcraft & ranne into Fraunce with a mightye masse of gould, where he maryed a kinsewoman of kinge Lewis, hauing with her the towne of Valentia: then by the ayde of the kinge beinge at perpetuall league with him, he purloyned to himselfe great dominion in Italye, being therein much furthered by the Pope his father. The daughter of this Pope Alexander called Lucretia, with whom the monstrous father had vsed carnall companye, was maryed to 3. Princes one after another. First to Iohn Sfortia duke of Pisauria, then she being deuorced was matched wt Alosius of Aragon bastard of king Alphonsus: he beinge slaine she was wedded to Alphōsu… duke of Ferraria. What her honestye, religion, and modestye was in the Court of Rome during her fathers estate, it maye be gathered sufficientlye by these two Uerses made vppon her death, by Iohn Iouianus Pontanus.
Hic iacet in tumulo Lucretia nomine, sed re
Thais: Alexandri filia, sponsa, nurus.
Here lyes Lucretia chast by name, but Thais lewd by lyfe,
Who was to Alexander Pope both doughter and his wyfe.
¶The Uerses of Actius Sannazarius vponupon the yeare of Iubelie kept by Pope Alexander.
Pollicitus coelum Romanus, & astra sacerdos,
Per seelera & sedes, ad Styga pandit iter.
The Romaine priest that promised both heauen & starres to sell,
By treacherye and murtheringes hath made a gap to hell.
¶The Uerses of the same auctour againe Lucretia the daughter of Pope Alexander the 6. reprouing her horrible incest vvith her father.
Ergo te semper cupiet, Lucretia S…xtus…
O fatum diri numinis: hic pater est?
Ierom Marius in his booke Eusebius Captiuus speaking of this Pope Alexander hath these wordes: What should I disclose ye detestable treachery of Alexander the 6. wherof the like hath not bin heard? He making a league wt the deuils of hell, bequeathed him selfe bodye & soule vntounto them if by their helpe he mighte attain… to the Papacye: which when the deuils had perfourmed, Pope Alexander began so to refourme his life, that he neuer went about anye busines, but that he did first take councell of the deuill.
Other pranckes of this Pope Alexander were partlye written in these Uerses compendiouslye.
Vendit Alexander cruces, altaria, Christum:
Emerat ille prius vendere iure potest.
De vitio in vitium, de flamma transit in ignem,
Roma sub Hispano deperit imperio.
Sextus Tarquinius, Sextus Nero, Sextus & iste:
Semper sub Sextis perdita Roma fuit.
Pope Alexander selleth Christe with aares & crosses store,
And reason good yt he should sell the thinges he bought before. &c.
In the time of this Pope the pall of the bishop of Mentz was enhaunsed, to be payde for it for euer heareafter vntounto the Popes Chamber xxxv. Thousand Florences. Among other enormities wherewith this Alexander swarmed, he poysoned Gemen brother to Baiazetes the great Turke & prisoner at Rome, receyuing for the same deede wherwith he was hyred by Baiazetes two hundred Thousand Crownes. Furthermore to maintaine his tyrannye he ioyned league with the Turke against the French kinge and craued his assistaunce, vsing both the kingdome of Naples & Rome it selfe for his owne royat sake: as the fortresses to ye Empyre of Ottomannus. Beside he cōmaunded ye tongue of Antonius Mancinellus and both his hands to be cut of, because he in a learned and eloquente oration reproued his licentious and loathsome demeanour. But as he liued wickedlye so he dyed myserablye, for he preparinge a feast for diuers Senatours and Cardinals, purposing to poysō them with the same bane, that he poysoned Cemen: but by the prouidence of God one of the wayters ignorantly gaue the Pope the same bottell wherein the poyson was, wherof he drinking dyed with the reste. Finallye in one thinge this Alexander matched ye wickednes of his predicessours in graunting leaue to a Spaniard Petrus Mendoza Cardinall of Valentia, to vse his bastard sonne Marquesse Zanatensis otherwyse then becommeth vowed chastitye: but hereof enough. And beside this Mendoza was well knowen greatly to dishonour ye spowsall bed of his soueraigne king Ferdinand.
Anno 1499. one Ierom Sauonarola a dominicā monke with other his fellowes were burned at Florence, for defending the communion vnderunder both kindes, condemninge the Popes pardons, and for reprouing the loose life & negligence of the clergye generallye. They denyed also ye Popes supremacye: saying that the keyes were giuen to the whole Church, and not to Peter. Againe yt the Pope followed Christe neither in life nor doctrine, because he attributed more to his owne pardons & traditiōs then to ye merits of Christ: & yt his cursinges & excōmunicaiōs are not to be feared. He prophecied also of certaine things to come as of the destruction of Florence and of Rome, and the restoring of the true Church at length: for the which Picus Mirandula calleth him an holye Prophete, and defendeth him in his wryting against the Pope. Also one Marsilius his neighbour, and Cominoeus in his French historye, do attribute to him the spirite of prophesyinge: and diuers other learned men do defend that he dyed an innocent.
161. Pius the thirde.
PIus the thirde borne in Hetruria and nephewe to Pius ye seconde, called first Franciscus Picolhomeneus after great debate amonge the Cardinals succeded Alexander.
Valentine Borgia after ye death of his father purloyning his treasure did beset yt Vatican with xii. Thousand souldiours, it beinge the place where the Pope was elected, thinking by this drift to make the Cardinals stoupe to his purpose: but they to auoyde this daunger did forthwith conueye themselues into the Temple of Minerua, where they were forthwith enclosed by him. Hereuppon a rumour ran through ye Citye that the elders were apprehended, that all the Citye was molested with …laughter and spoyling, so that all men were amazed. This being hearde doares were shut vp, men toke them to their weapōs, the streat passages were stopt with timberlogs & irō chaynes: and thus was all in an hurlye burlye and a great vprore, as if the hoast of Hanniball had bin battringe the gates of Rome. But Valentine because he sawe that he had attempted an harde matter, being requested by ye Cardinals to giuegive ouer his wilfull purpose, did promise to cease by & by and to obey them. Then when this Pius was chosen, Valentine abating his courage, did thanke the Cardinals because they had chosen him Pope whom he most desired. He being Pope did forthwith rayse an armye to driue out those Frenchmen that dwelt in Italye, taking it in dispite that their king had subdued Apulia and a great part of Italye: but the Pope hoped for a daye to gall the Frenchmen to enclose them in a trap, and in the end to hunt them vtterlye out. But while he purposed these thinges he dyed of an vlcer in his legge, the xxvii. daye after his creation Anno 1503. the same yeare also that Alexander also dyed, the xv. of the Calendes of Nouember.
And here endeth the sixt booke of these prelates, contayning in it 41. Popes from Innocentius the 4. to this Pius the 3. whose corrupt liues as is partly shewed thoughe not so larglye as mighte be, do argue of what spirite they were and howe farre from Christian conuersation. But if their fantasticall and superstitious decrees were ioyned hereunto, where withall they loaded the Church and choaked the Gospell, their doctrine would appeare to men of any iudgement, as vnsauorye as their trade of life: but it would be ouer tedious, and pertayneth not so much to our purpose.